Hello Muddah...

This is the best picture I could get of the kid I shipped off to camp with bed head. 

As I watched the other kids and their boisterous behaviour in the line, I turned to him and sighed
"You don't have to do this you know".

"I know" he simply said as he stared forward into absolutely nothing.

"I can figure something out".  Truth was, figuring something out would have been tough to arrange at such a late stage.

"No, I'll be okay".

I figured he was nervous.  First time being sent away with strangers on a bus full of rowdy kids - not exactly within my comfort zone, I couldn't imagine it was within his.

I remembered when my mom tried to send me to camp.  I absolutely hated the idea of it.  Going on a bus with a bunch of strange kids without knowing anybody or even knowing where I was going.  The only thing that prevented me from a breakdown was the excitement of my new toothbrush and travel-sized toothpaste tucked away safely in my backpack.

When it came down to it, I actually never did make it on that bus.  I had failed the head lice check and ended up spending the week with my cousin.  Turns out I didn't have head lice, plus I got to spend a week with one of my most favourite people in the whole entire world. I would say my "camp" experience was a pretty good one.

and I turned out pretty okay.

The head lice checkers came around.  I secretly hoped that he had head lice so we could get the hell out of this line up.  I thought about all the "what ifs" that could happen - and I wasn't ready. I thought about bullies and bones breaking, poison ivy and snakes and of course Jason Voorhees.  I secretly hoped my kid had head lice to escape my own fears. Ridiculous.

When we passed the inspection, EVILBOY saw his friend, ran away and waved over his shoulder while yelling "Bye Mom!".  It was like ripping off a proverbial band-aid.  I didn't have time to react before he was gone to grow up a little more. I looked around nervously at the other parents.  I made eye contact with a woman and laughed nervously "oh, he'll be back in a minute once he realizes I'm leaving".

He didn't come back.

My child - the social butterfly.

I sometimes wonder how things would have turned out if I had gotten on that bus.  I probably would have made a few new friends, probably had a tear or two. I might have gotten a letter from home (and if my mom was as cool as EVILBOY's mom, it would have been on Minecraft stationary). Maybe I would have had my first kiss instead of being pinned down on the school yard and being kissed by that little red haired creepy boy. Maybe I would have become a camp counselor and be a mentor for kids when I got older.

Who knows.

I hope my son gets to experience all the good things I missed out on at camp. 

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Hello..this is my blog. I bought this fancy theme and I don't know what to write here just yet. Maybe one day remind me I have to write something inspiring here?


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