They say home is where the heart is.
In my case, my heart is split equally between two places - and it has been for a very long time.

Unconditional love versus comfort.
Security versus pride.
Family versus other family.

It all comes down to a decision.  One that I know in the end will end up breaking someones heart.
But a line has to be drawn. An end to it all.  Hoping that in the end, it is not my own heart breaking.
As selfish as that sounds.

This has been my home for a very long time.  My pride promised to never leave.  I love my My friends. My neighbourhood. My old school.  and him.

The truth is, I have committed myself to someone who is never coming back for many years.
I somehow felt that if I stayed in this place I could always be near him and now I realize how much it hurts.
Things are changing.  Maybe I'm getting older (wiser) or maybe life just goes on - and I am still just here.

It is time to let go. Stop trying to control the way things should be and start living again. There is part of me that is screaming to get out. Recently it has become so prominent in my life.  She wants to move on.  To change.

I am still not one hundred percent sure.

It's terrifying to not know that things will be okay.  That this is the right decision for us - but sometimes you just have to jump in feet first - without plugging your nose. 

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Hello..this is my blog. I bought this fancy theme and I don't know what to write here just yet. Maybe one day remind me I have to write something inspiring here?


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