I hate giving up - but I'm afraid I feel defeated.
|Testing my allergies..|
Ever since I have been diagnosed with Psoriasis, I have been fighting - so hard - to find a cure, or even some sort of relief, with no avail. I've been to numerous doctors, had many blood tests and all it keeps telling me is that my immune system sucks.
My doctor has been really great. When I go into his office, frantic about the new patches that have appeared, he listens to me and agrees to try anything I ask of him. I respect him for that so much, but I have ran out of ideas.
Today was the final test. The allergy test. I begged my doctor to send me for this test back when I thought I may have Lupus. Months later, I was in to see the doctor for my appointment today. Just like the others, the doctor took out her little tools and looked at the patches on my face and arms up close. Unlike the others, this doctor told me to stop trying to change my diagnosis. It is definitely Psoriasis. No allergy test is going to show any different. I have a disease - most likely given to me by my biological father - so nice of him to give me something in my 30 years of life.
To make myself feel better, I bought a new tube of $20 cream to see if this is my miracle cure (only 5 billion more creams to try) and some Christmas presents for myself (including a massaging neck pillow and bum warmer for my car).
I feel like I am being punished for something.