I have a fragile heart. An incident that happened late last week was still bothering me eight days later. I keep thinking how I could have changed the outcome, did I handle the situation properly, should I apologize again?
I held on to this dark cloud in my heart for eight days. It haunted me at all hours of the day and I did lose sleep.
Long story short, I almost ran over my neighbour accidentally. It was completely my fault. Reversing the car out of a tight parking spot, stopped when EVILBOY asked me a question and then went again without looking, figuring nobody would have stepped behind me in those 15 seconds.
The woman involved in the incident, who was once friendly with me, was now waving her arms like a maniac and hopping around irately. I apologized, as tears stung my eyes, and she just kept ranting on until I drove away. With my proverbial tail between my legs and my heart in pieces.
I don't like when people are angry with me. I try to please everyone, even if just offering a smile or holding a door, making people happy always makes me feel a little better.
I struggled with her reaction for days. Quite honestly, I more "cut off her path" than almost ran her over. Her reaction was quite shocking to me, especially after I apologized as sincerely as I could.
A few days ago I remembered an incident I had with this same woman over the laundry room. The laundry room on my floor was in use so I had to use the laundry room on her floor. As I put my key in the door, this woman whipped open her door with laundry soap in her hand and an angry glare on her face. I asked if she was about to do laundry and she huffed and replied "WELL I GUESS I'M NOT NOW AM I?". I stepped aside and said she could do her laundry and that I would go down another floor. To which she pushed past me without so much as a thank you.
and now I realize that you can't please everyone.
It's far too tiring and life is just way too short. It's just too hard to try to make someone enjoy their life a little more when their arrogance and rudeness constantly gets in the way. Incidents like this are not going to change who I am. I will continue to try to make people smile, to try to make their day a little better. I know how awesome it feels when someone holds the elevator for me or helps me pick up my mail when I drop it.
I am not going to be walked all over either by someone who is only nice to me when it is convenient for them.
I have learned my lesson. I will no longer be distracted when driving. EVILBOY has to learn this too because I just keep thinking of the what ifs of this situation. What if I didn't see her at all? What if I was going faster than 2 km/hr? What if that was a KID?
Am I sorry I almost ran her over? Heck yes. I am embarrassed and still a little sad about he situation.
but when it comes down to making her enjoy her day a little more, or doing her any favours I guess the best I can do is tell her to go fly a kite.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Hello..this is my blog. I bought this fancy theme and I don't know what to write here just yet. Maybe one day remind me I have to write something inspiring here?