I stink as a photographer!

Mason's t-ball pictures were returned...looking like total crap! I just knew they were going to be horrible..it all started with the photographer's attitude and the way she handled all the children...pitiful.

I ended up returning them and getting a refund (which was surprisingly easy - I was calling ready to argue and the lady just sounded defeated and asked who to write the cheque to).

So Mason was without baseball pictures, can't have that right? So I decided to do my own little photo shoot in the backyard. Keep in mind we do not have any pets that go in our yard, and we especially don't have a dog. So I'm kneeling on the ground to get down to Mason's level and I'm thinking peee-u what smells? I think you see where this is going?

Yep. I kneeled in a fresh pile of dog shit. A steaming pile of poo in my completely fenced-in backyard. I'm surprised I didn't lose it....I just calmly got up and went inside and changed my pants....I can laugh about it now but I think I was a little in shock when it happened!

...now let's rub a little salt in the wound shall we? I LOST THE PICTURES I TOOK!!! I got a nasty computer virus...totally my fault too...and when I backed my pictures up I must have forgotten those ones :(

It's a bird...it's a plane...

Wrong superhero...but he still liked me saying that anyway. I don't even know if Batman has a catch phrase...I will have to look into that.

Woohoo? Am I blogging from iphone?

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Dear Mr. Ferrell...

Thank you for almost making me pee my pants in public...HILARIOUS as I expected (but you gotta have my sick sense of humour I guess!)

Ladybug...

The bus ride to the grocery store is always long and boring and I often find my mind wandering to many things on these trips. My iPod helps, but it is only a temporary fix before I find my mind wandering. I think some pretty crazy things sometimes, and some mean things sometimes too.

Say for instance yesterday, during this boring trip I saw a ladybug walking across the back of the seat in front of us. My first thought was A) I hope Mason doesn't see it
B) I wonder if it will climb into that lady's hair - it was getting pretty close! C) Yikes! I hope there isn't one on the back of my seat trying to climb into my hair (this is followed by 10 minutes of shifting in my seat all while trying to look over my shoulder to make sure there were no lady bugs near me).

After a while, in the moments where a normal person would have shooed this lady bug away from the innocent lady's hair, I started to feel sorry for the little insect. I figured she/he (let's not stereotype the ladybugs!) could use a lift outside. He/she was probably trapped on the bus. I was thinking of ways I could scoop the little ladybug up and shove him out an open window somewhere without looking like a total fool when I heard....MOM LOOK!!! It was too late.

Mason mauled that poor ladybug for the rest of the trip. First he tried to get it on his finger which in turn led to the ladybug falling to the ground and getting a nice little smoosh between the pudgy fingers to be picked up again. Then it was *poke* look he has white eyes *poke* he's not moving *poke* he loves me. Once that little bug was on his finger I just knew we had ourselves another pet.

When the long boring journey was over and we arrived at the grocery store it started to pour rain (just my luck right?). I was rushing to get inside but Mason took his time. He took each step so carefully and held his little hand over the ladybug like an umbrella. I had to convince him to leave his new pet outside because I really think ladybugs in grocery stores are something that are frowned upon in this day and age. Of course when we came back the ladybug was gone and he was upset and although it is sad because he was so in love with that little insect, I am so happy we didn't have to take the ladybug home and happier one didn't go in my hair!

Hasta la VISTA WIndows XP :(

I'm so angry at myself. I downloaded something bad...something I shouldn't have... (no, not porn for everybody who still doesn't believe me after the Pee Wee post) but it was bad and unfortunately I picked up a virus....a bad one. A trojan horse which made my Norton Antivirus shake it's finger at me and say SHAME ON YOU over and over again...okay it didn't really say that but it kept popping up saying something about it blocking infostealer for me every 5 minutes.

So what did I do you ask? Well I said about 5 billion curse words, bit the head off everybody in my family and threw things at them until I couldn't throw no more. Once my tantrum was over I simply (okay not so simply) had to turn to VISTA *shudders*. I've heard nothing but bad but the problem was I could not get rid of the virus, my computer did not come with a Windows XP disk when I bought it (XP was pre-loaded and they sent me the Vista disk when it was released) and I had nowhere else to turn...so Vista it is.

I gotta say though...the girly half of me is really giddy about it. It has all these cool widgets on the side...In fact, I'm typing this post from one right now (ooh aren't ya all jealous). The only downside right now...apparently my keyboard is NOT compatible so it keeps switching to French Canadian mode which in turn makes all my letters look like this: çèàè.

So I learned my lesson. I vow to never download anything that could get me into any kind of trouble what so ever.

Flickr

This is a test post from , a fancy photo sharing thing.

David Duchovny, Why don't you love me?

Okay so as much as it KILLS me to say I didn't really heart the x-files movie - alas it is true. I did not heart the x-files movie. It wasn't terrible...I could never say that, but it was a little disappointing.

In 1998 I would have wrote in my Hello Kitty journal about how excited I was to see below David Duchovny's belly button...BELOW PEOPLE!!! I am a grown up now. It didn't even phase me to see his almost nudiness (probably because he's not a very shy actor!). I am so over him...I'm going to write that in my Hello Kitty journal right now!

To tell the truth (which is out there...haha I joke!) it just wasn't x-files-y enough for me. Where were the aliens? The cigarette smoking man? Krycheck? Not even one UFO? The black foggy eye people? Oh and those two other people who were in the later seasons that I didn't even bother to watch....what were their names? Oh well who cares about them anyway...the one guy was from Terminator 2...he creeps me.

Of course while I was walking home alone from the theatre (yes I went alone to see the X-files movie. Call me a nerd all you want but I did. Just don't call me Pee Wee Herman. I would never pull a Pee Wee in a movie theatre that I practically grew up in! - OMG pull a PEE WEE!!! I so made that up!!).

Anyway back to walking home...so I'm walking home past all the drunks and crazy lesbians (it's gay pride weekend here...those lesbiens love me I tell ya!) and of course I see what I believe was a UFO...hovering over my house. Of course it was hovering over my house because it is waiting for me to get home so it can abduct me and put metal in my head and stuff. Okay so it was a star...but it was a pretty convincing UFO for a while there. It was really really bright, it didn't move and it was the only star out...[play X-files theme music here].

So the movie was predictable (which is so not even cool for a sci-fi movie!), even though the drunken uber x-philies next to me seemed to be shocked by every revelation made in the entire 2-hr movie, it just didn't do it for me. It also left a lot of questions unanswered (do I smell sequel?). Of course I loved seeing David Duchovny on the big screen again....his wrinkles and all..he is still my favouritest hunk.

One thing that really threw me for a loop was the fact that people are STILL lining up to see Batman?? WTH people? That was SO last week *rolls eyes*

Heard from the bathtub...

Mason: Mom!! I've got marbles in my dee-dee [dee-dee is his cutesy name he calls his boy parts].

So of course right away I jump to conclusions! He has cancer or he was bitten by a brown recluse spider. Upon further investigation I could see that he was holding onto his testicles (I'm sooo blushing right now even typing that!) and saying there were marbles in there.

I stammered out the first answer I could come up with...those are not marbles. I thought that was a satisfactory answer for a boy of his age. Until he asked me what they were. I had horrible visions of him going to school talking about testicles to all the other kids. Not only that, if I told him what testicles were, would I have to go into detail about what the other parts were? Do I even *KNOW* what the other parts are? At that point I knew puberty is going to be a rough time in this household.

After thinking about it for a bit and thinking of the proper thing to say to my very curious 4-year-old, I decided the best answer was....

Just be quiet and wash your marbles

Girl Cheese and Boy Cheese??

Me: Mason do you want grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner?

Mason: No, I want boy cheese!!

I still think he's gonna be a smart cookie though....honest!

Sometimes it's too hard to hold the belly laughs in...

I (heart) The Joker!

So I went to see The Dark Knight this weekend. I was one of those people who waited in line to see a Batman movie...I admit it. The trailer for it was just SO good and Heath Ledger too...how could I not?

Let me tell ya, it was so worth it waiting in the longest line ever wondering how all those people are going to be able to fit in one theatre, the cost of a Saturday night movie ticket (I'm so cheap), the flare in my neck injury I got from having to sit in the third row and not to mention the crazies who came out in their capes (who am I kidding, if I had of known people were dressing up I SO would have joined them, I got a Batman costume downstairs - so not kidding!). I was really excited to see Batman, even though I still hold a grudge against Adam West for being so mean...I was actually excited to see this new batman guy (I've never heard of him before, nor have I even seen Batman Begins yet!). Who the heck am I kidding? It was my mega-crush that I still have on Heath Ledger...there I said it.

Of course I started to tear up when I saw his character for the first time. His tragic death and him having a young daughter when he died reminded me so much of what Mason is going through now (Mason was 15 months old when his dad died). Something about a child losing a father...heart breaking. Not to mention he was so young and talented. Ughhh....off that topic!!

His character was AMAZING. The mannerisms were so perfect. I really didn't know what to expect going into this movie but seeing the way it was done was absolutely perfect. I really don't have much more to say about it. The story was great, the characters were awesome (especially The Joker!) and it really kept you on the edge of your seat (for the whole two and a half hours!).

One thing that really irked me though was Batman's creepy voice. Okay that HAS to go. He sounded like an old man trying to take a poop. Bad bad voice. It wasn't even the actor himself, it was when he was Batman and him trying to disguise his voice...puh-leaasee!!!

So to sum it up, Batman...so worth paying full admission price for...but Batman really needs to think about changing his creepy voice.

Slip and slide!!

Tell me, who in their right mind can't have fun on a slip and slide? Luckily for Mason they just happened to go on clearance at Zellers this past weekend and we got a pretty awesome accident waiting to happen outdoor activity for $5.98!

I think I was more excited than he was...until I saw the disclaimer they added to the packaging. You must weigh less then 110 pounds and not be over 5 feet tall. Since I don't quite match that profile my mind started to race to all the times I've seen drunken adults fling themselves down these things and end up with some major injuries...so I passed and flung Mason down it instead!

He had so much fun he pooped his pants (I only wish I was kidding - sorry Mason). Anybody who weighs less than 110 pounds (how do they measure that someone has to weigh that much anyway? Did they test someone who weighed 115 and realized that was too much so they rounded it down to 110?), is less than 5 feet tall, wants to have crazy fun, possibly break a bone, maybe see some blood, and then afterwards poop their pants...come on over!!!

So, I'm pretty much cool now...

I've been rockin this iPhone G3 since last Friday. In case you are wondering, my brother was the first person in line and I received the very first iPhone. The whole process was maddening though because it took a few hours for it to get through the server at Rogers before I could even sign the contract (which I had to get into a new contract...boo!!). I walked out of there..with a phone that didn't even work because I was in such a hurry to get back to my job.

But the nightmare all turned out well in the end. I've been enjoying people drooling over my phone all week..it's very rare I get a new toy that makes other people drool. I even think the guy in The Source peed a little when I showed it to him (I was looking for a case...not showing off I swear!!). I'm loving all this tecnology at the touch of a finger. I've discovered that I can blog from places I've never even dreamt of (note: these have not all been tested)
-Blog from my bed
-Blog from my front porch
-Blog from my back patio
-Blog from the park
-Blog from the bus
-Blog from the toilet (yes...sad but true)
-Blog from the work bathroom (with a gas mask on)
-Blog from a boat
-Blog from a foreign island somewhere with volcanoes
-Blog from a car

...okay you get the idea! I swear I have been technologicallly deprived all these years because having all this stuff with me wherever I go just makes sense. Now when I see the butt crack on the bus I can take a pic and share it with you guys instantly rather than describe it (they say a picture is worth 1000 words right).

Although it's been great and I've really enjoyed everything about my shiny new little "assistant", I am beginning to wonder if it might be a little too much technology for me. First of all I was a little cheesed because when I plugged my old iPod headphones in my iPhone they were so crackly...I was so disappointed. I told my brother what happened and he called me stupid and said they were not compatible (Well...duh?? How the hell was I suposed to know that!?). Apparently the new headphones have a little clicky thing and a microphone so you can answer a call while listening to your music...brilliant. This little device put me in a pretty awkward situation the other day.

I was sitting on a bench waiting for a bus rockin' it to Ryan Adams when my phone rang. I did my little clicky thing and said hello. Unfortunately for me, it was a call from work and at that very moment when I did the little clicky and said hello a crazy was walking by, we shall refer to her as Psychella from now on. Here is how my phone conversation went:

Me> Hello?
Phone call> Hi..you left me a message about...
Psychella> HI
Me> ~listening to caller~
Psychella> HELLO WHAT?....WHAT???....HELLO??
Me (getting agitated, doing the shoo motion with my hand to psychella)
Psychella> HEY? WHAT?...HELLO WHAT??
Me> I'm on the phone...do you mind???????
Psychella's bf> Come on, she's on the phone...

With that Psychella stormed off. I can see how she got confused that I may have been talking to her. After I motioned the go away sign you think she would have gotten the hint? Perhaps even me telling her that I was on the phone might have clued her in? Nope she stood there staring at me like a crazed lunatic. It wasn't until her boyfriend told her I was talking on the phone when she turned and left. Yikes!

If it wasn't such an important call I would have asked the caller to hold a second while I told her I was on the phone but I was trying to listen to the instructions and psychella was just so...irritating!!

I have learned not use the clicky button in public anymore. Awww...I really liked the clicky button too :(

Mason's sleep positions #483

The half off (or on if you prefer) bed technique...

Feelings hurt...

Mason's feelings were hurt today by his best friend. I feel so sad for him. From what I hear, his best friend (who shall remain nameless to protect identity - haha) threw sand in his eyes when they got into an argument and after [nameless] called Mason a "poop head" which really upset him...maybe even more than the sand in the eyes since poop head is such a "bad word".

I really found it all a little humourous but that all changed when I saw my poor little baby getting all teared up about it. He's having a little spat with his best friend..it breaks my heart that he's so upset about this.

Surprising...

Mason actually let someone paint his WHOLE face. Usually he's okay with getting a "face tattoo" which will last for a total of 2 minutes of his face...he kept this little masterpiece on his face until he could scare Nana....then he wiped it off right away. Oh well at least the pictures prove he had his face painted.

iPhone...

I am so technologicalistic now! I have an iPhone, as a matter of fact, thanks to my brother (who was on the news) I was the first person to walk out of the store with it (after becoming agressive with the sales clerk who was taking too long for someone who was at that point 3 hours late for work).

I'm still learning things though....in fact, just today I learned that I cannot blog from my iphone...I'm kind of sad about that....I was looking forward to blogging on the road...I guess I'm not that technologicalistic (I think I made that word up, but I like it).

Anyway, it's been a busy couple days...I need a nap. I leave you with my first iPhone picture...

My little artist...

Mason drew his first picture that actually resembles something tonight. I'm SO proud!!! I'm especially proud of the little man falling and yelling "AAAAAAAA". My kid has the greatest sense of humour I tell ya!

Practicing with flash...

I got a new (used) speedlite yesterday...my first one. I'm so excited to learn the possibilities with flash photography! This was taken at 8pm in my DARK GREEN bedroom....sure it may be a little funky in a photographer's eye...but I'm still learning!

This is the last thing that poor snail saw...

With a whole garden available for them to slime...why do snails insist on sliming up my front steps? Poor little thing didn't see it coming :(

I heart Ryan Adams

The only way I can describe his music is brilliant. I'm sure everybody in this house hates me when I listen to his songs because I have to hear the same ones over again and again because there is just something about them and when I hear a song once I have to hear it again right away because I miss it already..it's a vicious cycle.

Not to mention he is incredibly sexy...I say that in the most respectful way possible. There is just something about him. Although I feel a little strange sharing that information since we do share a last name...and who knows, we may be related in some way?

I remember once in elementary school I told a girl in my class I was related to Brian Adams(famous Canadian Rocker - think Robin Hood Soundtrack) - I said I was his first cousin at that!! Well didn't she go to his concert and meet him and said she knew his cousin...yeah that went well. I learned never to make up lies about myself again after that day. Except for the necessary ones...you know the ones like I do not sit in my pyjamas all day on Saturdays and eat Nutella out of the jar and that I do not wish that Keith Urban would leave Nicole Kidman for me. Those kind of things are okay to lie about, right?

I'm getting off topic here...My suggestion to you is to listen to his songs, the music, the lyrics they are so amazing. I absolutely adore him!

My To Do List....

The To-Do list of a procrastinator...here you have it!
(not in order of importance by any means!)

1. Take another photography class
2. Find a new place to store the towels
3. Get a chest for the end of my bed (maybe to store the towels!)
4. Get a flash for my camera - Done July 7, 2008
5. Get passports for Mason and me
6. Take driver's ed classes
7. Paint my bedroom
8. Buy a bathroom scale
9. Lose 10 pounds
10. Lose 20 pounds
11. Organize garage (don't know when this will happen...too scared of spiders!
12. Have a yard sale
13. Finish my favourite blogs list Procrastinator...I am not!
14. Start Avon business - Done July 7, 2008
15. Have friends over on a Saturday to hang in the backyard
16. Find out where the bees are coming from in the backyard
17. Label all my posts (ohhh mannnnnnnn)
18. New curtain rod in dining room
19. New curtain rod in Mason's room
20. Clean/organize spare room
21. Get a desk for the spare room
22. Organize my office
23. Update my daycare information (oops...been a while!)
24. Re-arrange photos in the My Pictures folder had to format HD...does that count?? Now I have 0 pictures in the My Pictures folder!
25. Back-up photos on external HD
26. Print photos up until current date.

"I have TWO play rooms!"

Something caught my attention the other day in a conversation that Mason was having with a kid at daycare. He was asking if the kid wanted to come to his house (oh no!) and then with much enthusiasm said "I HAVE TWO PLAY ROOMS!!".

I thought for a minute, how does he have two play rooms? He has a bedroom and a play room? Then it dawned on me...the bedroom has so many toys in it and the play room sits for weeks(completely trashed as usual) with nobody playing in it.

I think this has to change!! It all started when my brother (who has his room downstairs beside the play room) told Mason that there was a monster in the play room. He rarely goes down there now unless he has a little friend over or if he REALLY wants to play with those Little People.

When I noticed he stopped going down there, I moved the train table upstairs. It took up a lot of room in his bedroom but it was the only way it would get played with. Then slowly and one-by-one all of his toys started coming upstairs.

I went downstairs to start organizing for my yard sale and the room hardly has any toys at all and his bedroom is overflowing with toys!!! I'm here pulling my hair out over this, I don't know how to keep upstairs toys and downstairs toys separate.

I think I will start with the train table. It takes up so much room in his bedroom and the toy room looks bare without it so back downstairs it goes (the poor thing has been moved 4 times since we bought it!). I just bought a kiddie basketball net on Friday ($18.99 at Wal-Mart - great deal!) that can go downstairs too.

How do you keep your toys organized without stepping on Hot Wheels and tripping over Lightning McQueen?

Me vs. The Clothesline

Today we spent a lot of time outside fixing up some "problem areas" in the backyard. First of all I wanted to put up my clothesline. It's one of those old fashion "umbrella" type things...wow...this is a "quotation-y" post ha ha ha!! Normally this would be an easy task. You just have to go to the hardware store and spend $24.99 for the little metal piece that goes into the ground. Do I like to spend $24.99 on a stupid piece of metal that goes into the ground?? Hell no!!! I'm too cheap! So I do what any good bargain hunter does...I improvise (which was also a pet peeve of mine growing up since my mom usually "improvised" which one year led me to having nylons on my head spray painted green to look like a martian for Halloween.).

This project has been a long time in plan but today a little lightbulb (a very small one) went off in my head and I decided to put this big heavy monster clothesline in an pail and fill the pail with bricks to hold it in place. Good plan or what?? Now my first thought was to pour cement into the pail but I didn't have time to watch cement dry...I had clothes to hang!!

So the first task was to untangle the weave of lines which took a good portion of an hour or so. The next task was to get my fingers and my flabby arm caught in the pinchy arms. Then I had to call in my brother to hold it while I put the bricks into the bucket. We soon discovered that the ground was not even enough plus it was uglier than all heck so we decided to move it to the side of the house.

To make a long story short, we ended up tying it to my back steps 3 times (which actually lead to a door that looks like a door but is not really a door...it blows my mind...a whole blog post of its own!). Now I am just waiting for my neighbours to complain about the uglyness that is this clothesline. Yaay for being environmental and stuff!!

Mason woke up crabby from his nap but soon came out and played basketball in the driveway, darted out on the road after his ball went out there (heart attack) and went crazy with the sidewalk chalk and showed me how to play hopscotch again. I love weekends!

Want to know when you should stop holding your child's hand?

When you feel his finger flicking in your hand over and over. You get annoyed and ask him what he is doing to which he replies...


I'm wiping the booger off my finger.

Time to let go of hand!!

Wonderland Then and Now...

THEN...

Back sometime in the 1980's when "booty shorts" were the norm for my poofy shirt mama...Wonderland was a pretty awesome place. You can see the hot air balloon ride is still kickin (see now). I just love the similarities between the two trips. In picture one I am riding the same ride Mason did (see girl with yellow jacket) and like Mason...my mom also put a goofy hat on me to protect me from the sun!

NOW...

Getaway...

Our little weekend getaway went pretty well...I honestly thought it was going to be a disaster!

Mason came down with a case of diarrhea/vomitting on Friday morning. Lucky me got to pick him up from daycare, dropped him back off at home with my brother and had to go back to work to make sure things were finished up before my little trip.

Mason seemed to be fine after spending the day resting messing up my house. We left and only had to stop once because he had to poop "real bad"..which turned out he didn't have to poop at all..and he planned it pretty well because the next place to stop happened to be an ice cream store in the middle of nowhere...go figure.

Saturday we went to Wonderland. We had to stop one time on the way to Wonderland for Mason to pee...and apparently vomit. Which was lovely. I was a little nervous to let him go on the rides...but his excitement level peaked and I knew he would be okay so he went on all the big scary rides that his little body was tall enough for! He was actually tall enough to ride the Ghoster Coaster and the Thunder Run this year which was pretty exciting for both of us. Unfortunately he got injured on both of those rides. The Ghoster Coaster incident happened when he smacked his lips off the safety bar and on Thunder Run when mommy pulled the safety bar down right on his nose!

Sunday we said happy birthday to Hayden and Mason was very excited to learn that she got some "tickets" in her birthday cards...

So it was a good little getaway. We came home on Canada Day just in time to celebrate some fireworks. The next day Mama caught the stomach bug that Mason had and lost 5 billion pounds and is finally starting to feel better.